When Governor Newsome finally reopens our lives, will we immediately abandon our new-normal of staying home, getting high, ordering from every restaurant that delivers, and procrastinating?
Abandon we may, because we’ll have to go back to work. That’s why it’s important to tackle this task now with a check-off as thick as a fatty to track your accomplishments. Ladies and Gents – it’s the 10 movies you need to see while in a sheltered high.
Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy (2004) Will Ferrell’s clueless newsman character is tough to take sober, but somehow, he’s brilliant when you’re high as a kite. It’s filled with inspired silliness and quotable lines, which you won’t remember, because, you know, you’re high—but stay classy.
The Big Lebowski (1998) Jeff Bridges is The Dude. Dudeness. Duder, or El Duderino. He stumbles through life smoking, drinking White Russians, bowling and worrying about the completeness of his room décor. Watch it and you’ll abide.
Animal House (1978) Toga parties, boozy parties, trashed parties, naked parties including Donald Sutherland’s ass 42 years ago. What more do you need?
Fight Club (1999) This movie creeps up on you. Initially, you’re like, “yeah, that’s cool” but the twist at the end makes you hit play again. Get really comfortable because you’ll be there for a while. ALSO (Brad Pitt and Jared Leto half naked while covered in sweat is always nice).
Dude, Where’s My Car? (2000) Waking up from a night of partying and not remembering a thing, random tattoos on your body and someone’s underwear next to your face? I think we have all been there… but the journey to find the car is what makes this movie so GOOD.
Ted (2012) A stuffed teddy bear that talks, drinks, smokes a bong, drives himself to work and somehow has sex with women. Instant classic.
Dodgeball (2002) We love to root for the underdog, especially when it’s Vince Vaughn playing himself. Ben Stiller is the maniacal workout meanie that gets off by stuffing pizza down on his Johnson. Oh, and there’s Dodge ball and a trip to Vegas.
2001: A Space Odyssey (1968) A space movie to watch in 2020, created in 1968 about life in 2001. Looking back, that movie was never meant to be viewed without being under some influence. Bonus: climactic music.
The Lego Movie (2014) With this film, you don’t need to smoke weed to see the Legos move, but it makes the animation look so much better and their mouths move when they talk!
Willy Wonka & The Chocolate Factory (1971) A wonky factory of chocolate rivers. Any other questions?
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